• Let go of thinking it is your job to make everyone happy, take on everyone’s problems and fix them.
• Let go of old beliefs and ideas that are keeping you stuck or are no longer working for you
• Let go of toxic people, habits and behaviors.
• Let go of the need to be perfect, better than others, or the best.
• Let go of thinking someone out there is going to give you what you need to be complete or happy.
• Let go of thinking life works for everyone else but you.
• Let go of everything that holds you down or keeps you stuck.
• Let go of thinking someone out there is going to give you what you need to be complete or happy
• Let go of everything that holds you down or keeps you stuck.
• Let go of the fact that your parents, children, spouse did not turn out to be who you want them to be and learn to make yourself happy.
• ~Flyer from a 12-step program

Detaching is…

• Letting God take care of the universe, not you
• Letting people have their own lives,
• Realizing you can’t be a savior to anyone,
• Accepting that even with our best efforts, life doesn’t always turn out the way we want it to.”
• ~Handout from a 12-step meeting

Detachment is self-preservation

“One of the happiest moments ever is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.” ~Back Towards Light

Detaching with love is a very difficult but very necessary step in regaining emotional health. It is a life long commitment to one’s recovery and is something that needs to be practiced daily. ~Melodie Beattie

“There is Nothing you can do to please everyone, to be perfect enough, to make everything all right, no matter how strong you are.” ~unknown

“The more you hold on, the more your sense of self-worth goes down because you made your self-worth dependent on something outside you, using it to meet some need. Letting go restores your power back to you.” ~Chuck Spezzono

“Release with love!”

Those words convey…warmth; caring without possessing, concern without domination, involvement without suffocation. Releasing with love allows (others) to face the painful consequences of their…(actions) in the knowledge that this pain is necessary for their recovery…” ~Handout from CODA

Detachment – What does it mean to you?

Often heard is the word detachment. Much has been written about it but it continues to be misunderstood.

We have all been emotionally involved with others, dependent on them for our happiness, and then crippled by the need to control them. It is no wonder detachment is difficult to understand – and even harder to achieve. It sometimes becomes the excuse for emotional withdrawal, bitter revenge, icy lack of interest.

But detachment really is love at its most productive, most free and best. It is caring enough about others to allow them to be themselves and to learn through their mistakes. It is being responsible for one’s own feelings and welfare. It is being able to make decisions without an ulterior motive of influencing others or fearing their reaction.

True detachment is based on faith in a Higher Power wh will work things out for the best if we but do our best. There is no need, then, for worry; for guilt when things don’t turn out as planned; no need for fear.

Some say “Release with love.” Those words convey more warmth, caring without possessing, concern without domination, involvement without suffocation.

Allowing others to face the painful consequences of their drinking or unacceptable behavior, in the knowledge that this pain is necessary for their recovery – and doing it without rancor or sentimentality – this is a release with love.

There is Nothing you can do

• To please everyone
• To be perfect enough
• To make everything all right
• No matter how strong you are

Let Go and Let God

As children bring their broken toys with tears for us to mend, I brought my broken dreams to God because he was my friend.

But then, instead of leaving Him in peace to work alone…I hung around and tried to help with ways that were my own.

At last, I snatched them back and cried “How can You be so slow”?

“My Child,” He said, “What could I do? You never did let go….

To Let Go

To Let Go is not to stop caring, It’s recognizing I can’t do it for someone else.

To Let Go is not to cut myself off, It’s realizing I can’t control another.

To Let Go is not to enable, But to allow learning from natural consequences.

To let Go is not to fight powerlessness, but to accept that the outcome is not in my hands.

To Let Go is not to try to change or blame others, It’s to make the most of myself.

To Let Go is not to care for, it’s to care about.

To let Go is not to fix, it’s to be supportive.

To Let Go is not to judge, It’s to allow another to be a human being.

To Let Go is not to try to arrange outcomes, But to allow others to affect their own destinies.

To Let Go is not to be protective, it’s to permit another to face their own reality.

To Let Go is not to regulate anyone, But to strive to become what I dream I can be.

To Let Go is not to fear less, it’s to love more